Board Thread:General Discussion/@comment-26684445-20161115020208/@comment-26919152-20161120191541

Elle: There! Right There! Look at that tan, well tinted skin. Look at the killer shape he's in. Look at that slightly stubbly chin. Oh Please he's gay, totally gay.

Callahan: I'm not about to celebrate. Every trait could indicate the totally straight expatriate. This guy's not gay, I say not gay.

All: That is the elephant in the room. Well is it relevant to assume that a man who wears perfume is automatically radically fey?

Emmett: But look at his coiffed and crispy locks.

Elle: Look at his silk translucent socks.

Callahan: There's the eternal paradox. Look what we're seeing.

Elle: What are we seeing?

Callahan: Is he gay?

Elle: Of course he's gay.

Calahan: Or European?

All: ohhhhhh. Gay or European? It's hard to guarantee Is he gay or European?

Warner: Well, hey don't look at me.

Vivian: You see they bring their boys up different in those charming foreign ports. They play peculiar sports.

All: In shiny shirts and tiny shorts. Gay or foreign fella? The answer could take weeks. They both say things like "ciao bella" while they kiss you on both cheeks.

Elle: Oh please.

All: Gay or European? So many shades of gray.

Warner: Depending on the time of day, the French go either way.

All: Is he gay or European? or

Enid: There! Right There! Look at that condescending smirk. Seen it on every guy at work. That is a metro hetero jerk. That guy's not gay, I say no way.

All: That is the elephant in the room. Well is it relevant to presume that a hottie in that costume

Elle: Is automatically-radically

Callahan: Ironically chronically

Vivian: Certainly pertin'tly

Warner: Genetically medically

All: GAY! OFFICIALLY GAY! OFFICIALLY GAY GAY GAY GAY DAMNIT!

Gay or European?

Callahan: So stylish and relaxed.

All: Is he gay or European?

Callahan: I think his chest is waxed.

Vivian: But they bring their boys up different there. It's culturally diverse. It's not a fashion curse.

All: If he wears a kilt or bears a purse. Gay or just exotic? I still can't crack the code.

Brooke: Yes his accent is hypnotic but his shoes are pointy toed.

All: Huh. Gay or European? So many shades of gray.

Judge: But if he turns out straight I'm free at eight on Saturday.

All: Is he gay or European? gay or european? Gay or Euro-

Emmett: Wait a minute! Give me a chance to crack this guy. I have an idea I'd like to try.

Callahan: The floor is yours.

Emmett: So Mr. Architacos... This alleged affair with Ms. Windam has been going on for...?

Mikos: 2 years.

Emmett: And your first name again is...?

Mikos: Mikos.

Emmett: And your boyfriend's name is...?

Mikos: Carlos. I'm sorry! I misunderstand. You say boyfriend. I thought you say best friend. Carlos is my best friend.

Carlos: You bastard! You lying bastard! That's it. I no cover for you, no more! Peoples. I have a big announcement. This man is Gay and European! and neither is disgrace you've got to stop your being a completely closet case. It's me not her he's seeing No matter what he say. I swear he never ever ever swing the other way. You are so gay. You big parfait! You flaming boy band cabaret.

Mikos: I'm straight!

Carlos: You were not yesterday. So if I may, I'm proud to say, He's gay!

All: And European!

Carlos: He's gay!

All: And European!

Carlos: He's gay!

All: And European and Gay!

Mikos: Fine okay I'm gay!

All: Hooray!